Whether you’re packing a lunchbox laugh or just want to turnip the fun at home, these veggie jokes are sure to sprout smiles all around. Lettuce get laughing!
Vegetable Jokes and Riddle Jokes
We’ve dug up the freshest vegetable jokes and riddles just for kids! These clean, silly, and rootin’-tootin’ funnies are great for family giggles anytime. How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch! What’s a vegetable’s favorite kind of joke? A corny joke. Where do young veggies go to school? Kinder-garden. What happens when Chuck Norris chops an onion? The onion cries! How do you make a garlic laugh? Tell it a clove-r joke. Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable? Because it’s got heart. Why did the cucumber need a lawyer? Because it was in a pickle. What do vegetables say at parties? “Lettuce turnip the beet.” What room can be eaten? A mushroom! What did one spinach plant say to another? You’re my soil-mate. What do you get if you cross a dog with a vegetable? A broc-collie! What is a chicken’s favorite kind of vegetable? An egg-plant. What did the salad say to the dressing? Lettuce be friends! Why are tomatoes so good at singing? They always hit the ripe notes! What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot! What do you call an angry pea? Grump-pea. What do you call a vegetable who loves to tell jokes? A pun-kin! Why was the pepper meditating? To find inner spice. What kind of vegetable likes to look at animals? A zoo-chini! Why should’t you tell secrets on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes, the corn has ears, and the beans stalk. Why did the vegetable call the plumber? It had a leek. How do you catch a whole field of corn? With a cobweb. What do you call a story about a beautiful vegetable princess? A fairy kale! What kind of vegetable do you need when you have a flat tire? A-spare-agus! Why do beets always win? They’re un-beet-able! Why did the broccoli go to therapy? To get to the root of its problems! What was the snowman doing in the vegetable patch? Picking his nose! What do you get if you cross a dog with a daisy? A colli-flower. What happens when you eat artichokes? It breaks their hearts. What did the sweet potato say to the pumpkin? I yam what I yam. What do you say to a loud vegetable? Turnip down! What kind of table can you eat? A vegetable! What’s a radish’s favorite type of music? Root and roll! What happens when you make a bean and onion casserole? Tear gas. What veggie loves hanging out in dark, spooky basements? Cellar-y! What do you call beans that forgot their sunscreen? Baked beans! What type of flower shouldn’t be put in a vase? A cauliflower. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash! What is the potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato! What is a taxi driver’s favorite kind of vegetable? A cab-bage. What vegetable is always cold? A chilli. What do you call a corn that’s full of itself? Corn-fident. What do you call an onion that jumps up and down? A spring onion. How did the broccoli feel after a workout? Stem-tacular! What is green and goes to a summer camp? A Brussels’ scout. Which vegetables can’t you take on a boat? Leeks. Why did the cabbage win the race? Because it was ahead!
Vegetable Puns
Get ready to jump into fun with our pun-tastic collection of vegetable puns! Perfect for cards, lunchbox notes, or just a giggle in your day, these jokes are “radishingly” funny and totally kid-approved. Will you be my Veggie-tine? I wish you a hap-pea birthday! You’re un-beet-lievable. I leek you a lot! You grow girl! I carrot about you! Gourd vibes only! Don’t stop be-leaf-ing! I’m just vine, thanks. You’re such a sweet pea. I yam so impressed! Rootin’ for you! Let it bean. You brock! You pepper believe it! Be-leaf me! Bean thinking about you. Spread hap-pea-ness! Lettuce celebrate! Also, check out our collection of cucumber jokes, carrot puns and jokes as well as broccoli jokes for giggles.
