Perfect for telling at the barn, sharing with friends, or sneaking into a lunchbox for a surprise laugh, these horse jokes are nothing but good, clean horsing around. So, grab the reins and get ready to trot into a world of laughter, these jokes are truly un-bridled fun!
Horse Jokes and Riddle Jokes
Saddle up for some seriously funny horse jokes and riddles! Whether you’re looking for a brain-teasing riddle or a silly joke, this collection is full of laughs. So, grab the reins and get ready for a hoof-stomping good time! What’s a horse’s favorite sport? Stable tennis! What is a horses favorite state? Neigh-braska. Why did the owner name his racehorse “Bad News”? Because bad news travels fast. What did the teacher say when the horse walked into the class? Why the long face? What does a racehorse like to eat? Fast food. What did the mare say to her foal? “Hay, it’s pasture bedtime!” Why can’t horses dance? They have two left feet. What’s a horse’s favorite drink? Lemon-neigh’d! Where do horses get their hair done? Maine. What is a horse’s favorite wine? Chardon-hay! How can I help my possessed horse? With an ex-horse-ist. What do you call a well balanced horse? Stable. Why did the horse cross the road? Someone shouted hay! What do you call a horse that’s not wearing a saddle? Neigh-ked. What did the horse say when it fell? I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup! Where do newly married horses sleep? In the bridle suite. What do you call a noisy horse? A herd animal. How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse? With Southern horspitality! When does a horse talk? Whinny wants to! I recently bought a horse and named him Mayo. Mayo neighs. Why did the pony get an F on his report? Because he missed the mane point. What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air? A seahorse. What do you call a horse that lives next door? A neigh-bor! Why was the horse always in a bad mood? Because he always saw the hoof-empty side of things! What’s the difference between a Western horse and an Eastern horse? About 2,000 miles. Why do cowboys ride horses? Because they’re too heavy to carry. Did you hear about Cinderella’s horse? Once upony time… What disease was the horse scared of getting? Hay fever! What’s the hardest thing about learning to ride a horse? The ground. How do they vote in the horse senate? With a yay or neigh. What do you call a scary horse in the dark? A nightmare! Why did the man stand behind the horse? He was hoping to get a kick out of it. How do you get a jockey to wait a moment? Tell him to hold his horses. What did the horse grow in her garden? Horse radishes. What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little hoarse. What did the cafeteria chef say to the horses? Stop horsing around. Why did the horse run away in the middle of its wedding? It got colt feet! What kind of bread does a horse eat? Thoroughbred. Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude? He always said neigh. When do vampires like horse racing? When it’s neck and neck. What does it mean if you find a horseshoe? That some poor horse is walking around in his socks. What score did the horse get in his exam? Hay-plus. Where do horses go when they’re sick? The horsepital. What do you give a sick horse? A cough stirrup. What branch of the horse military does a horse serve in? The Neigh-vy. What kind of horse is the fastest? A pregnant one, because it has 2 horsepower. What street do horses live on? Mane Street. Did you hear about the horse who had to go to court? At first, he was going to lie, but then the judge reminded him he was under oats.
Horse Puns
Giddy up for a wild ride of horse puns that will have you trotting with laughter! These pun-tastic jokes are perfect for birthday cards, lunchbox notes, or just horsing around with friends. So don’t rein in your laughter, let these puns gallop straight into your heart! I’m saying neigh-thing. You’re looking foal-tastic today! Have a mare-velous day! You’re haylarious. Horsing around is my mane hobby. Hay there, friend! You’re my mane man. Also, check out our collection of shark jokes, fish puns and jokes as well as octopus jokes for more under-the-sea giggles.
